A Theory in Time Travel
by God Is Wearing Black
Summary: S.H.E.I.L.D. is down, the Avengers are dead and Loki sends the last person anyone wants saving the world back in time, Darcy Lewis. She's got to save Loki from his madness, the universe from Thanos, rescue Pietro and Wanda, and finally cross that supernatural three-way off her bucket list. Contains humor but is not a comedy, it's actually pretty depressing. TaserTricks
1. Chapter 1

It all started when Darcy wondered when the world had gone to shit. She had witnessed far too many of her friends deaths, sustained a staggering amount of life threatening injuries, and when a crazy purple super sayian tries destroying the universe you know your fucked.

She had laughed bitterly at the thought and relayed her musings to her metaphorical cellmate. Loki was one of the few surviving gods after the attack on Asgard, the death of his parents was a nail in the coffin. Loki had found humility and joined up with earth to help protect midgard. Thor died not long after that and Loki had become almost obsessed with the survival of humanity. Everyone was dead now. The Avengers obliterated, SHIELD disbanded, even the Justice League had gone silent besides tons of other superhero organizations. All the was left was the god of mischief and the taser toting assistant of Jane Foster.

Loki perked at the mention of Darcy's words and she felt herself go pale at the glint in his one good eye.

"Genius, Miss Lewis you somehow always manage to surprise me,"

"I'm feeling vaugely offended," She muttered and scratched at a cut on her abdomen. "So, uh, not that I'm not aware of my superior intellect or anything but why exactly am I a genius?"

"Not the why, but the when," Loki had slid his eyes closed in concentration.

Darcy huffed in slight agitation "Wow, that was _so_ incredibly specific, I _completely_ understand now,"

Loki sat up straighter and turned to face Darcy, "Lewis, what happens if you kill an animal that would later spread the black plague?"

Darcy rolled her eyes, _He's not going to try and speak philosophy with me again, is he?_ Surprising to find out that Loki was a chatty Cathy when drunk, that was no easy thing either, He also has an incredible amount of tales and facts stuck up in his big head. That's a perk of being an immortal god. She still had a headache from their last chat about why elves couldn't grow beards.

"Does… it never happen?" Darcy guess feebly

Loki nodded yes, and stood suddenly, whipping around to walk out the door. Darcy scrambled off the floor and quickly rushed after him, his long legs making it difficult for to keep up with. He lead the way down the long stone hallway their footsteps echoing off the walls.

"Why can't you ever just answer me straight?" Darcy ungracefully tripped an uneven tile "Ow, Dammit Loki! Where are we going!?"

"To the beginning Miss Lewis!" Loki's voice sounded the closest thing to hopeful than she had heard in a very long time. She prayed that was a good thing.

"What does that even mean?!"

"Only thing it can mean!," they were in a full on run now when Loki turned his face to her and flashed her a terrifying smile "Time travel!"


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Hey guys I'm so happy that I've been getting follows for this story, and if you guys have even looked at my profile you would know that I have a ton of projects crammed in there, which we all know can only lead to pain and tears. Well I just finished my finals so I decided you guys deserved this and while it might not be published on break it is being written now.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own the Avengers, it is the creation of beloved Stan Lee, Joss Wheadon, Marvel, and other those other lesser known people of high importance.**

 **ONWARD!**

Chapter 1:

"Only thing it can mean!" Loki turned his head to face her, a terrifying smile graced his lips "Time travel!"

Darcy stumbled again in a combination of her surprise and clumsiness. Loki was such a little shit.

"Time travel?! What the actual fuck Loki?!" It was zero surprise that all she got in response was slightly crazed laughter. Even fighting side by side with Loki for years would never get her used to his antics. At least she could proudly say she didn't shit her pants this time.

Loki and Darcy had been using many of SHIELDS abandoned bases as shelters for the past couple years, Thanos didn't really seem to go back to his bloody battlefields, Darcy wondered if it bothered him before reminding herself that this guy was trying to destroy the universe to impress a girl who didn't even like him.

After they had fled their little monastery in Greece, Loki had spent the next two weeks dragging her around the world to collect a bunch of meaningless garbage, Loki didn't like it when she called it that so she mostly kept her mouth shut, but honestly what the hell did they need the jawbone of a ass for anyway. The most realistic option was voodoo.

"How did you even know where to find that thing?" she had asked when they stopped in Asia to nab what Loki said was, "the heart of an unfaithful man," she disturbingly didn't get any answer.

The trickster himself was keeping very hush-hush about the whole plan, Darcy didn't see the point, they were partners after all but hey you can't win them all. In fact, time travel wasn't actually spoken of again until she had broken her patience vow and demanded to be clued in.

Loki seemed a bit too easy to convince once she tried but she wasn't complaining. He was putting his newest ingredient into their travel duffel, the bright obnoxious orange one Darcy owned, when he huffed in thought.

"The universe is on the brink of collapse and there is no saving Midgard, it is too late for that, we were only delaying the inevitable really," He began.

 _Way to be optimistic_

"But then you had rambled about when this disaster started and it struck me, time, time is earths only salvation," He shook the duffle slightly for emphasis "Time manipulation is not something taken lightly and has only ever been done a few select times, it is unstable and dangerous most would not take the risk. We have nothing to loose Miss Lewis,"

Darcy's face softened as a look of sorrow passed over his face, grief and regret for all that he had lost. She laid a hand on his shoulder, squeezing it comfortably. She still remembered the day the team had come back from a infiltrate and capture mission and they were one huge teddy bear short, there hadn't even been a body to bring back, Loki didn't talked for days.

"With the right items and a combination of my magic I will attempt to send me back to my body from before all this happened,"

"What? You mean us right?"

Loki's lips twitched "Of course, both of us,"

Darcy dropped her hand hesitantly before breathing deeply. "Okay, what's next?"

Loki placed the hideous duffle near the entrance. "Not far from here is a plain where the fabric of reality and magic are thin, my magic will be more potent there, it is the best place to perform the ritual,"

"What like now? Like right now?" Darcy tried not to look to panicked.

"No, we should probably sleep and get started tomorrow while we have more light," He sat down and leaned against the wall before sliding his eyes shut. Darcy wished she could sleep that easy. She balled up her jacket and stuck it under her head as a makeshift pillow, the ground hard and uncomfortable. Silence fell across the room.

"Hey Loki?"

A moment later "Yes, Darcy?"

"What's Asgard like,"

"It fell out of the sky and was swallowed by the darkness,"

"I meant before,"

"I know you did," She didn't think he had to sound so patronizing about it.

"Hey Loki,"

"Loki?"

"Reindeer games?"

"What?"

"Did you really have sex with a horse?"


End file.
